Archive for the ‘Emotional Wellbeing’ Category
Be an Agent for Positive CHANGE
By Meghan McChesney Gilroy
- Saturday, October 18th, 2008
“Don’t pay more than 10 cents, more than 3 times.” - don Miguel Ruiz, author of The Four Agreements
I feel my frustration rise as I listen to a loved one vent. I’ve heard this story a hundred times before. Why won’t they try something different? Why won’t they CHANGE?
Cha-ching! I catch what I’m doing to myself. I’m using their story against myself. I’m the one who is feeling frustration. Ouch! I’m the one who hasn’t changed my response.
I laugh at myself, dig deep in my pocket and drop a quarter in my CHANGE jar. My reaction just cost me a quarter. I’ve just joined the ranks of the Agents for Positive Change. Let me explain.
Last weekend, Rita and I were teaching Life Mastery Dreaming. Our group has been exploring what we contribute to our lives personally and to what’s been going on globally. We recognize that we contribute our energy, whether it’s “positive” (expansive, unconditional, accepting) or “negative” (constricting, limiting, judgmental).
Our energy comes from the thoughts we have, which in turn create the emotion felt in our body as sensation. This emotional energy is what we send out to the world. It affects not only our selves and our bodies, but those around us and the environment itself. Each of us make a big impact on the world based on what we think and feel. So as a community of individuals dedicated to personal growth and transformation, we’ve made a commitment to take responsibility for what we have been adding to the mix.
Responsibility? Some of us groaned. That word can invoke some old, heavy energy. But we’ve re-framed responsibility to mean “the ability to respond” or more accurately, “having the ability to choose your response.”
Hmmm. That kind of responsibility doesn’t sound so bad; it could even be fun. As dreamers, we love to have fun so we search for practical, innovative ways (whatever it takes!) to increase our awareness, i.e. responsibility. That’s how we came up with Be a Positive Agent for Change.
Here’s how it works. Every time we have an emotional reaction, we’ve agreed to put a quarter in our CHANGE jars. Rather than being a punishment, it’s a tangible way to see the cost of our emotional reactions on our lives and on our bodies.
Each thought has the potential to manifest in our body as emotion. The quality of the thought determines the quality of the emotion. For example, if I think, “The stock market is crazy. I’ve lost a fortune. I’ll never have enough money to stop working.” then I start feeling anxious and stressed.
When I think, “I am so grateful for all I have. I appreciate that I have enough money that I can invest some of it in the stock market. I trust that I will find ways to take care of myself.” Ahhh, I relax a bit and can feel more positive. My energy contribution remains in the plus column.
I’m aware that the story that I’m telling myself either “costs” my body in the form of stress, tension or constriction - or supports my body in feeling relaxed, open, and expanded. (Hint: This is how the law of attraction really works.) When in awareness, I can make the choice to take responsibility - to choose how I want to respond to my own thoughts, to people in my life, to the stock market, or politics, or whatever is happening in the world at large.
So back to the Dreaming weekend… I was sharing how don Miguel used to say, “Don’t pay more than 10 cents, more than 3 times.” That means don’t beat yourself up, don’t judge yourself over and over, don’t replay the same story in your head and feel the same reaction if you are paying for it emotionally.
We began joking how with the cost of inflation, 10 cents is now the equivalent of a quarter. And the idea of setting out a CHANGE jar was born. (One dreamer quipped, “That brings a new meaning to CHANGE.”) We agreed to place a quarter in our CHANGE jars each time we have an emotional reaction.
When we gather next month, we’ll pool our change - both all the coins we’ve place in our CHANGE jars, and all the awareness and responsibility we’ve gained. Then we’ll use the money to make a donation to a worthy cause. We’ll become agents for positive change. Now that’s putting our money where our mouths are.
Now back to my story of feeling frustration. How did I choose to change? Instead of pointing my finger at my loved one, I chose a different response. I chose to really feel the frustration. I took a deep breath. I let the sensation of frustration pass through my body.
As I shifted back into a place of calm centeredness, I had compassion for all of us who are working to change our ways. I had compassion for all of us who fall asleep and believe stories of lack, limitation, “there’s not enough” or “I’m not enough.”
I took responsibility for my choice - the choice to feel, instead of believing my thoughts - and I felt better. I gladly deposited my quarter. After all, that’s a small price to pay for a lot of awareness. I’m proud to be an Agent for Positive Change.
With all my love and compassion,
Agent Meghan
P.S. True Confession/Full Disclosure - Contribution to date: $1.50
So what have you been contributing?
What has been your response to your own life and to the world at large?
Won’t you join us in being an Agent for Positive Change?
How to Be An Agent for Positive Change
- Find a jar for collecting your quarters. Label it “CHANGE” jar.
- Each time you have an emotional reaction, take responsibility - invoke your “ability to choose your response.” Try choosing feeling over thinking by simply taking a deep breath and putting your attention on the sensations in your body.
- Place a quarter in your CHANGE jar as a tangible reminder of your commitment to awareness, choice, and responsibility.
- At the end of the month, donate your CHANGE to a worthy cause or non-profit organization.
- Share your insights with us by commenting on this blog. We’d love to hear from you!
Wake Up!
By Meghan McChesney Gilroy
- Monday, June 23rd, 2008
This weekend we celebrated the Summer Solstice within our Dreaming Community. We traveled to Western Massachusetts to a beautiful retreat surrounded by trees, a river, birds, lightning bugs, lush green.
The Solstice marked a transition between the light and the dark. We gathered light, or energy, to illuminate the dark, or any belief within the program in our minds, any emotion, any sensation that is not in alignment with the Truth of Who We Are - energy, light, Life. Throughout the weekend, we talked about Awareness, the choice between love or fear, emotional purification and a transformational process to support that, and our role in the evolution of Humanity at this time.
My intent from the weekend was to take even greater responsibility in my life, to consciously choose what I am experiencing in each moment.
Monday morning, 5 am. My one year old, Bodhi, awakens ready to start the day. I am tired, praying he will go back to sleep. But no, he is now wailing. I stumble down the hall, feeling cranky. I am supposed to be able to sleep in after a Dreaming weekend. This isn’t how I want to start my day. As I lift him from his crib, I remind myself that I made a commitment to choosing love. I assume this reminder will make the crankiness go away.
We head downstairs for breakfast and I am aware that I still feel cranky and I still don’t want to feel cranky. I catch what I am doing and laugh at myself. The program in the mind is so subtle, so sly. I made the erroneous equation crankiness does not = love, which is my intent, therefore I should not be feeling this.
I shift my attention. I remind myself of the process I taught. Welcome the emotion. Breathe. Let it flow. I welcome the crankiness. I breathe. I let it flow. This is love. Allowing what I am in the moment, cranky. This is acceptance. The crankiness moves through me, flows.
I look around our home. There are piles and piles of stuff strewn about that haven’t been unpacked from the weekend (and trust me, with a one year old in tow that’s a lot of stuff). The dishes are teetering on top of one another in the sink from last night’s dinner. This morning I was supposed to unpack, clean up, prepare for the week but I decide to be gentle on myself and take a walk with Bodhi and Gorda, our dog, instead.
We run into DaDa (Jamie) at the local coffee shop. Bodhi learns that a “rose” (pronounced “wose”) is a kind of flower. We take the time to sniff one and the petals shower down onto Bodhi’s feet. We admire the boats (boats! boats!) in the fog-shrouded harbor. We push the stroller in circles until we are laughing and dizzy. We see two friends, three dogs, more flowers.
By the time we return home, I am not so tired. I am grateful that Life sent a message to awaken this morning (literally) - in the form of a crying baby. I appreciate my beautiful mind, and its good intentions for knowing how Life should be. And I am so pleased that I no longer believe what it says because, as always, Life had a much grander plan on this day, filled with light, for me.
The Grace in All Things
By Jamie Gilroy
- Monday, April 14th, 2008
I love the definitions of grace as offered by the Random House dictionary. There are 11 variations on the meaning each equally evocative of a feeling. All paying homage to a grand word.
My life is full of grace. It is Sunday morning which has got to be my favorite morning of the week. There is a quality that is both poignant, and nostalgic. The light this morning is beautiful. The world outside must be asleep and so seems non-existent. Inside it’s me and Bodhi making breakfast while Meg sleeps too. I love this time with my littlest son. I get a chance to slow down to his rhythm, to not rush off anywhere, to have no agenda. We eat and then go play. I watch him closely to witness all that is shifting in him so quickly – he is standing, balancing on his own, creating little games, then moving on to another interest. There is this big sheepskin on the floor of his playroom that I lie on. We are listening to music (Explosions in The Sky – The Earth is Not a Cold Dark Place*) which Bodhi will often start bobbing to then go back to playing. As I lie there watching him experiencing life he lifts a small ball in his hands and offers it to me. I find myself flashing on a memory from long ago.
It is the end of summer 1980. My good friend Val and I have just finished our “Knights Without Armor” training in Boulder Colorado at the Blue Poppy Chi Kung Association run by Bob Flaws. We had spent the summer learning how to stand in low horse for an hour without moving by the Boulder Creek. We learned all about acupuncture points and Tai Chi Ruler, and Taoism and Buddhism. We drank beer and danced wildly into the early morning hours, then went to the 24 hour diner and ate breakfast. We rarely slept. We walked the mall in bare feet Val with his Bo or staff, me with my wooden sword. We would spar for no reason at a moments notice. We lived like kings without a country to rule. We perfected our art, let our hair go wild, grew strong and meditated like statues. We lived on Chi Gung exercises, faith and Dots Diner burritos. It was a summer I’ll never forget. In early September we left to hitchhike to Portland Oregon to visit a girlfriend of mine who over the summer shacked up with another man. Like samurai on a mission we left Boulder on a blazing hot Sunday.
Our first ride drove us all the way to Cheyenne and the junction of I-25 and I-80. I remember thinking how unusually hot it was for September with the sky a perfect deep blue, not a cloud in sight. Slightly parched and a bit hungry we walked down the ramp to get onto I-80 westbound. I looked down and saw a piece of fruit in the dirt on the shoulder of the ramp. I bent down to pick it up. It was a peach. I looked at Val, then at the peach. It was cool in my hands and felt perfectly ripe and totally un-bruised. I looked around at the sage and open land surrounding us. No peach trees, no fruit stands, nothing. I looked at Val again. We both smiled. I took a bite and handed it to Val. We shared the most delicious peach I have ever tasted and to this day 28 years later have not tasted another peach so juicy and sweet. Our story at the time was that the 18 Lohan, who look after warriors with integrity, had left it there for us as a sign of their approval.
My story now is that was Grace.
I start to remember all those moments in my life that had that feeling of Grace to them. At the time I may have called them heartbreak, failure, tragedy, longing, loneliness, struggle, surrender, searching. Now I see it all as just plain Grace. Like Bodhi learning to first crawl, then stand in balance, then walk, and finally run I see the beauty and grace in the moments of learning and progression from birth to death as one magnificent tapestry woven from one strand without end.
Grace.
In so much love.
J
Your World in Balance
By Rita Rivera Fox
- Friday, March 14th, 2008
Understanding emotion - how it is formed, what purpose it serves, what lies within its hidden messages, and most importantly how it directly affects your daily life, is one of the most powerful ways to bring your world into balance. When you open to learning how emotions affect the quality of your life experience, you begin to make new choices that contribute to your happiness and ultimately to that of all humankind. Imagine a day, month, lifetime of deep balance and happiness. Wouldn’t that be the greatest gift to give yourself and your loved ones?
Emotions surprise and delight us, they annoy and agitate us. They cause turmoil and conflict as well as feelings of goodwill and peace. Your own emotional response to situations in your life can baffle you, never mind trying to decipher your acquaintances, friends, and loved ones perplexing feelings and reactions. Yet we are all emotional beings. It’s what humans do - we manufacture emotions all the time. Your brain is designed to perceive sensation and your mind is designed to interpret this information, and the body is designed to feel. How we interpret the information that we perceive is what creates the emotional responses that are felt in the body. Everything that we feel in our bodies, we end up giving out to the world around us. Our emotions create a ripple effect. When you develop your emotional self awareness, you experience the possibility of bringing a sense of balance into your journey of self-discovery.
With the proper tools of perception and awareness, you can learn how to re-interpret your thoughts and emotions, allowing for the full expression of feeling and sensation to be experienced and enter into a new state of personal freedom and well-being. This brings harmony and balance to your self that can be shared with your loved ones.
Life Mastery Programs are devoted to guiding individuals through the process of unlearning patterns of beliefs that have created emotional imbalance and discontent. Opening the potential for learning how emotions effect the quality of your life experience, can ultimately guide and assist you in making new choices that contribute to your happiness and that of all mankind
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