Archive for the ‘Conscious Relationships’ Category
Romance: Part Two
By Jamie Gilroy
- Sunday, June 21st, 2009
Editors note: please re-read Romance – Part One again.M: But some people would say that that doesn’t sound like real life.
J: Of course it doesn’t. What happens in real life? Someone gets cancer and dies. Someone rejects you because your thighs are too big, your nose is too short. It’s all these expectations and judgments. We’ve been conditioned to see that it’s the goal, it’s the end game. It’s what does it look like after the romance. How many people say, “Oh yeah, romance is great but now we are married? Oh, I am married with children. Driver carries no cash, his wife has it all.” You know there are all these little things that support the belief that the romance at some point ends. Everyone wants a fairy tale ending but doesn’t believe it. Or people say, “Oh, that’s just a Hollywood ending. That’s Hollywood. It’s make believe.” Well, guess what? Your whole life is make believe. Why wouldn’t you make believe it in that way? I am with my beloved. Each second that I am with her is like a pit full of honey, dripping over each of our bodies. Rose petals falling from the sky. Moonlit walks. Tenderness that is so unbelievably excruciating in its tenderness. Is that make believe? Some people may say so. For me, it’s my life. That’s how I live my life. And that’s how I plan to live my life to the very last moment. And that romance is not with something outside of me. It’s with Life itself. It’s not focused just on my wife or my sons or my dog or my friends who agree with me. It’s focused on the entire thing that’s called LIFE. That thing that is coursing through everyone of us, moving through every tree, every plant. Every animal on this planet is alive in that way and it’s romance. It is romance. So say whatever you want to say. Say it’s not possible. That it ends after you get married. It ends after you have children. It ends after you get divorced. It ends with the angry client, the estranged sibling, the disappointed boss, the shitty economy and your vanishing wealth, your family of origin, the other side of the tracks you grew up in, the color of your skin. No. It never ends. And I’m here to tell you that. Ever. Unless you say it does. Unless you no longer want to live a romantic life. Don’t you see we choose. No one does that for us. Sure we all have valid reasons for being miserable, for being so unhappy. The litany of reasons is both long and varied. But when do we say, “I want this now before I die.” What if we really understood how unbelievably short our time here is? Wouldn’t we spend every possible second seeking out the honey like a little bear cub? Some of you in the audience are most certainly wondering if this doesn’t sound like some ecstasy fueled fantasy. That I must certainly get angry, yell at the kids, wake up grumpy, have my bad days. Absolutely. But what I also do is remember what the ecstasy feels like and seek to go back there. What being out of Romance with Life feels like. Let me tell you this. It feels like crap. And the more I’m in that romantic place the better I get at getting myself back there when I fall of the horse. Sure it happens. So what? What are you going to judge me for taking myself out of the honey pit? Do you judge yourself? What if for once you didn’t? What would happen? Would the big ol’ Wizard of Oz be exposed? An old man pulling levers behind a façade? Nothing there substantial at all? The honey of Romance is what’s substantial my friends. I have no doubt whatsoever. Now where is your doubt? Where is your faith?
Close your eyes for a moment and just imagine the exhilarating feeling of loving yourself and everything outside of you so much that your whole being is shimmering and light. What about it? What are we waiting for…?
M: (sigh)
END.
Enjoy the sweetness.
Love to you all,
J
Romance – Part One
By Jamie Gilroy
- Saturday, June 20th, 2009
I have been in a bit of a funk recently. Blame the weather. Blame the dog, the toddler, the wife, the job, the economy. Whatever. I found this inspiration for my next blog in a folder on my computer desktop called Writings. Not remembering what it was I opened it. The following conversation was transcribed from a workshop Meg & I gave a few years ago and we were discussing what romance really meant. In reading it over the funk I’ve been in lifted like the fog on the harbor this morning – just burned off from the relentless shine of the sun. Sometimes I need to remind myself of what the hell I’m really doing here. I share part of this transcript with you now. Enjoy.
J: Do you see how romance is everywhere in life? Unless you are just are a hardened person, or a criminal, or someone who has been so abused by the dream of the planet that they are cynical. We aren’t looking for cynics. Ok, so they’re cynics. Go enjoy it, have fun with it. I am looking for the romantics of the world. Closet romantics. Those people who dream of their beloved coming to them and taking an orchid and stroking their entire body with that flower. Wearing a light cotton kimono, a Japanese robe on a hot summer night and feeling the thrill of their lover as they untie the knot that holds it together. And slowly that kimono falls and parts. And it’s like mystery. It’s like looking up at a starry night in the middle of summer and the mystery of life. Don’t you see that? And in the parting of that kimono and the touch of his hand on her hip. Romance. Right there. And anyone can have it! Large, small, white, black, fat, ugly, gorgeous. It doesn’t matter. Romance is not a physicality. Romance is an inner quality. And it’s how you look at it. Everything is romantic. Everything. The walk in the morning. The dog walk in the morning and the smell of the ocean and the caw of the seagull and the light breeze blowing your hair and you feel like life is making love to you. What could be more romantic than that?
M: But how do you teach that to someone?
J: You teach it by showing examples. How do you learn anything in this life? 2 + 2 = 4. How do you learn that? They show you. They give you an example. They write the number 2 and the plus sign and the next 2, the equal sign and the 4. There is great romance in this world. Shakespeare has written some of the most romantic sonnets. Things that will blow your mind. There are books – The Bridges of Madison County – people scoffed at it. Why? Because they are cynical. They don’t believe in romance. I cried. I bawled my eyes out like Richard Simmons when I read that book. Poetry. There is great poetry. Poetry that a book called These luminous Things and there are poems in there from around the country. Rumi. Have you ever read Rumi? I grow moist when I read Rumi.
M: You’re supposed to go hard.
J: I grow hard when I read Rumi. Listen there all these great movies. Don Juan Demarco. Watch that over. You teach people the basic thing that you are going to teach people has nothing to do with romance and has everything to do with them. Who’s going to give you the opportunity to be romantic? Am I going to wait for you to be romantic with me? No. I’m going to be romantic with every aspect of my life. Brushing my teeth, brushing my hair, when I look in the mirror I don’t judge what I see. I love what I see. That’s where the romance begins. So. You have to start with people and their beliefs about themselves. It does come back to that. But you don’t linger there. You don’t spend tons of time. You say, “Look it’s your choice.” You want to feel differently about yourself, then just try it. Humor me in the next two days during the workshop, I want you to just put it on like a mask if you have to and wear and believe in it. Don’t have any doubts and don’t worry about what happens when the seminar is over and you go back to your life. Just be right here, right now in this moment and take my hand and I will lead you on the most romantic journey of your life. Are you ready?
M: I’ll sign up!
J: And this is how you do it. And it’s like a virus this romance, think about it. If it spreads, think about the romance that will be going on all around the world. People are having romance with their pets, with their parents, with their friends, with their co-workers. Every moment for each person is a romance and it’s not what you think it looks like. It’s not always someone coming and saving you, for women, or the knight on the white horse, chivalrous, and strong. It’s not going to look like how you think it’s going to look. But I guarantee you with the eyes of the romantic, everything is romantic in this world. Everything. Standing on the stoop with someone that you are so attracted too. You’ve just gone on a beautiful date and you’ve had an amazing meal, great conversation, had a bottle of wine, and you just feel like you are full. Full of love, full of romance. And you walk her to the door and you take her right to the front door and there is that beautiful moment where you are pausing, she’s pausing. And you’re not wondering, “Do I kiss her?” You’re thinking, “This is such a beautiful moment. I want this moment to last forever.” And suddenly you feel each of your bodies leaning towards one another. Your lips reaching for the other’s lips and you kiss and that first kiss is remarkable. It’s like fireworks are going off. That can happen over and over again. I’m here to tell you it happens over and over again. And that’s all. You say good night then. It doesn’t have to go any farther. You stood in the moonlight on a cold fall night saying goodnight to this person you spent 4-5 hours with. And you give the gentlest, the tenderest of kisses. And your lips touch and they melt together and then they come apart. And in that coming apart is like when you take a spoonful of honey and that last little strand of honey goes into your tea cup. Do you see? That’s enough. You don’t have to go upstairs. You don’t have to rip your clothes off. All you have to do is see the romance in that moment. And that carries the next time you talk to that person. The excitement. The giddiness. The childlike energy that you are feeling in your body is beautiful. That’s romance.
And I’ll tell you that we do diminish romance once we have obtained what we think our goal is. This is the key. We always think that the goal is to possess the other person, to have the other person, to have certainty that they want to be with us forever, that we want to be with them forever. They’re the one. We’re the one. Their in-laws are nice. My parents are nice. It’s ridiculous. That’s not the goal. The goal is to keep that moment, that kiss where you separate and the honey, the strands of honey between your two lips are pulling apart gently. That moment and I’m here to tell you this, that moment is pure romance, I’ve experienced it and I know it to be true. For me, it’s true. That moment can exist permanently between two people
M: But some people would say that that doesn’t sound like real life.
TO BE CONTINUED… Romance – Part Two
Love,
J
Footprints in the Sand
By Grace Sardonicus
- Sunday, March 29th, 2009
At 7AM I was walking to the quiet rhythm of low-tide waves washing up on West Beach in Beverly Farms. Rising above the cobalt water, the sun glistened so brightly that I turned away and began walking backwards. My gaze focused on my footprints that followed me. I was looking back at the path soon to be forever washed away into the ocean of my memories. I felt so much gratitude for what was behind me. I turned again to face what was before me. I closed my eyes and walked in the un-known. There was an exhilaration coursing through my body with each step. What a fun game representing a symbolic snapshot of my life.
The thread of my thoughts weaves into passages of life and aging. Here I am almost the big ‘50’ yet I still feel 30 minus all the kid’s hanging off my hip. Yes, there are hormonal and energetic changes. And where, oh, where did my memory go? The thing of it is, I feel happier and whole. I still love riding my bike, hiking up a mountain, doing yoga and dancing. I have slowed down. Maybe because I don’t feel in such a hurry anymore. Standing at a check-out counter in the grocery store, I observed a young mother cutting in front of an elderly woman who simply commented, ‘I used to be in such a rush until I realized, where am I rushing to? To be where I am now?’
When I was a young adult, I recall the complaints of my elders having physical pain and an inability to move as swiftly. Now I see how traumatized many of my 50 & over clients are by the very idea of aging: Their health and energy diminishing, the body and mind not as sharp and fit as it once were. Fortunately these individuals are taking constructive actions to remedy their ailments. The fact is we are all going to die. I think there is a big difference between being a victim of natural aging vs. aging with grace and not believing the mind’s program that aging has to look or feel a certain way. Who knows how it should feel? I say live with gusto, mindfulness and great respect for your temple. And be happy!
When I feel low energy and sluggish, I look at what I have or have not been doing. I then apply the tools that I have learned and do something about it. I love feeling alive and healthy. This feeling inspires me to share tools with others.
I reflected on my inspiration to create EmBodyDream programs: the years of Yoga, alternative healthcare, whole natural food diet emphasizing locally grown vegetarian foods, aerobic exercise to support my physical and mental health, and, most importantly, how I run my brain. If I beat myself up or think I’m a victim or worry about my ability to succeed or lay around complaining and whining, I’ll feel like crap. I will also age faster. When I believe any story that undermines my power and magnificence, I lose sleep and fall into a ditch that stops the flow of life. Instead I choose actions that give me pleasure, energy & happiness. I take that yoga class, get a massage, turn up the music & dance!
I thought about an exercise I had done years ago. At the end of my life what would I like my epitaph to say? It’s an exercise to check-in and see if I am living according to my life purpose. So as I traced my steps back along the beach to where I started, I spoke the words ‘She lived with gusto, grace & wisdom…generously sharing her love and inspiration with humanity.’ I say YES, I am living the words on my future epitaph. I just have to keep remembering to slow down, what’s the rush? Breathe, smell the salty ocean air, feel the warmth of the rising sun and be grateful for this magnificent, magical life.
For more info on EmBodyDream programs email Grace at graceventura1@gmail.com or call 603-651-9642
The Magic of Priorities
By Grace Sardonicus
- Monday, March 9th, 2009
Imagine a world where our children are happy, healthy, vibrant and compassionate.
Imagine a world with clear thinking, balanced, human beings living with gratitude and creativity.
Imagine a world where we respect, honor and listen to each other and ourselves. Health begins from the inside out. How can any of us serve others if we are not serving ourselves? Grace’s inspiration to create EmBodyDreamTM grew from the seed of her pure pleasure of dance as a child. Being in her body and feeling so much joy, creativity and freedom as a dancer was her platform. From the time I was conceived and throughout my childhood, the sounds of Chopin, Beethoven and Rachmaninoff wafted through the halls of my home, beautiful music that my Mother practiced 8 hours/day, preparing for concerts. The music opened a doorway into the visceral expression of my soul’s joy. I felt so inspired to dance. So I did. Whenever Mom practiced the piano I entered the living room which became an altered dimension of stunning creation and harmony. My heart’s desire was being expressed as I emulated the ballerinas that I deeply admired watching on the stages of the New York City Ballet. Grace, poise, peace and exuberance coursed through my blood, skin, muscles and bones. I felt alive and whole. My body said ‘yes’. I had a powerful, direct experience of what feeling healthy and happy in my body was like. Zooming to present day, I have created a recipe of how to maintain and evolve vibrant health. I discovered that health begins with how I think and what I believe. How could I be healthy if I don’t know what is truly good for me? I dedicated my life work to experimenting and learning tools to maintain extraordinary health for my mind, body & spirit. A key in my recipe is reclaiming what is most important by understanding priorities. What are your priorities? Your health and wellbeing? Your career? Your family? What comes first, second, etc? Do your priorities make sense? Why have you chosen one thing over another? Are you modeling what you were taught or did you choose on your own? We often don’t realize that we are re-creating patterns based on what our parents did. For example: Why do we believe we should take care of another before ourselves? From one point of view, we are judged as selfless and caring. From this same point of view, we would be selfish if we took care of ourselves first. From another point of view if we don’t take care of ourselves first, we would be irresponsible, neglectful and un-loving of ourselves. Who is to say what is right or wrong? You. What feels right to you? What makes the most sense? From my point of view, if I am not happy and healthy, I cannot possibly serve other’s whole-heartedly. Why would I want to just give part-way? In my personal review of priorities, I offer this idea:
- Evolving consciousness in mind, body & Spirit (which includes spiritual practice/education, health & celebrating the joy of life)
- Relationships: Family/Intimate & Home
- Dharma: Expression of my soul’s mission in service to others
- Finances: Includes conscious attitude & handling of money, i.e. Income/expenses, budget, investing, debt, etc.
- Satsanga: Community of like-minded individuals
- Travel, Fun
A quick time management lesson: The first step in understanding time management is about priorities. Once you put your self-care as a # 1 priority, you will magically find the time to accomplish whatever makes your heart sing. EmBodyDreamTM bridges our daily experience of life with the awareness to dream awake in this body. Learn to listen to your body with tools that provide a platform of health and wellbeing. EmBodyDreamTM offers programs in Self-Care with an emphasis on the physical body, Parenting and teachings from The Four Agreements & Yoga. She is currently teaching: Earthly Delights – Integration Tools to Prime your Body for Optimal Vitality and Wisdom & Grace – Recreate & Empower the actions we take everyday to manifest our heart’s desire! Ongoing classes in Wolfeboro,NH & NEW in Beverly Farms,Ma flyer Mother, How Can This Be – Upcoming Parenting Workshop this Summer Tools to parent from the inside out. With compassion, love & self-responsibility, we can create cooperative, loving and fun family dynamics! Contact for more information Contact Grace at grace@lifemasteryprograms.com. Stay tuned for her new website www.embodydreamprograms.com.
Please visit our Seminars & Journeys page for detailed info on Earthly Delights. Here’s a program synopsis:
Class 1: What is an EmBodyDream? Wake up to the distortions in your mind about your body. Why do we fall into ruts of ill health? Learn how to support great health by cultivating tools to ‘witness’ your mind. Take home tools & homework to support your journey.
Class 2: How do you treat your temple? Identify personal & family legacy. Let’s be the change that we want to see in our children & the world!
Workshop A: Cooking Yummy, healthy meals. Taste & take home great recipes.
Class 3: Transform attitudes & behaviors. Changing our planet begins with changing our body. Clean the temple!
Workshop B: Creative juicing. Learn how to juice & function in your daily life while safely cleansing toxins & rejuvenating.
Class 4: Rebalancing as a permanent way of inhabiting the body. Integrating and creating a support system.
Ground Hog Day Movie Homework
By Kevin Murray
- Saturday, January 31st, 2009
[To register for the Free Movie Chat Tele-conference call, using our Contact form, click here>contact form]
As I watched Ground Hog Day again, I saw the transformation of Phil as stages on a path of Awareness. As we are all on this same path, what can you see about Phil’s journey? How does that relate to your process? Can you identify different stages that Phil goes through? Have you gone through these? What are the key events, experiences, thoughts and emotions that trigger his shifts to new levels?
Please watch the movie with these questions in mind. We’ll schedule a tele-conference call after our return from Teotihuacan so we can enjoy each others’ responses to this. And,
HAPPY GROUND HOG DAY!
Your Gratitude CALL
By Michele Laub
- Friday, January 30th, 2009
When we are in a state of gratitude, we are placing an order for it, thereby spurring the creation of more. Gratitude is one of the highest vibrational energies of thought and feeling. The grateful mind is constantly fixed upon the best; therefore it will recieve the best. The more gratitude we feel and express, the more of what we want will manifest.
Join “Your Gratitude Call”
Monday through Friday
7AM US E.S.T.
218-486-3850
PIN 51601#
Find Your True Love Now – Part 2
By Jamie Gilroy
- Sunday, January 18th, 2009
It’s been snowing pretty much all day today. I shoveled earlier and just went out now to clear the walkways at our house and Junie’s driveway one more time before calling it a night. I couldn’t resist walking through the woods with Gorda before heading home. It was so beautiful – the snow covering all the branches, the trail deep and slow going. The further I walked the happier I became. What a gift to be able to have a few minutes in a winter wonderland with my dog. I came out of the woods and walked down a snowy empty street towards home feeling a sensation overwhelming my body. It was Love pouring out of me and releasing into the cold winter night. I was remembering six years ago when Meg & I had the very same vision sitting on a bench in southern California. Listen to this story. This is Part 2 of true Love…
I had planned to move back East after 9 months in Encinitas, California. I thought I would stay there forever, I was so happy. Unfortunately I was out of money and knew by returning East I could work in my old home town as soon as I got back. Meg & I had been friends but nothing approaching a romantic connection. Definitely a mutual attraction but a long shot for us to ever get together. For one I wasn’t really looking to be with anyone. I was enjoying raising Nick as a single parent and was coming to terms with some old stuff that was impeding my personal growth and was happy to be dealing with all that after so many years. I was OK with how things were – even that I was leaving SoCal. Anyway Meg and I had agreed to meet for breakfast a few days before the moving truck was to come and haul my life back to New England.
We met and went to breakfast and talked and talked like we had just resumed a long conversation. It was timeless. From there we went to one of my favorite places on this planet – Swami’s Garden at the Self Realization Fellowship. I mean this is literally the Garden of Eden. It is so beautiful it defies words. Go see it sometime, you’ll get what I mean. There is a bench that overlooks the ocean a few hundred feet below. Occasionally dolphins swim the break there. Usually there is a collection of surfers waiting for the perfect set. Meg had never been to this spot and I could tell she liked it. We sat on this little stone bench like an old couple, feet flat on the ground and our hands in our laps. We both closed our eyes and slipped into an altered state – a Dream if you will.
I don’t know how much time passed but a security guard came and asked us to leave because Meg somehow ended up straddling me and we were informed that was not appropriate behavior at the SRF garden. We apologized and left.
We then drove down to Moonlight Beach and parked my truck and sat staring out at the ocean. I said something like, “I had a really strange dream back there.” Meg said “me too”. I said, “what did you dream?” She said, “I dreamt we were getting married on top of the Pyramid of the Sun in Teotihuacan Mexico”. I was blown away because I had the very same dream.
Later that day I asked Meg to marry me. To my utter amazement she said yes without hesitating.
I knew I had found my “fully shining woman” at last.
Tonight as I walked out of the snowy woods I felt like I had come to the place in my life where I was totally happy and content, yearning for nothing. That feeling was overwhelming and essentially indescribable….but it all comes back to that moment on a bench in a garden when Love and Life merged and something so powerful was born.
Tomorrow, Part 3.
Blessings for the New Year.
J
Find Your True Love Now – Part 1
By Jamie Gilroy
- Saturday, January 17th, 2009
I feel like writing about relationships right now – maybe it’s the approach of Valentines Day. Who knows but bear with me. These next few blogs will have a thread to them. Hang on. The woods are snowy and my mountain bike is dangling from the rafters. What else is there to write about besides?
I have been checking out my oldest son Nick’s blog (www.nickgilroy.com) and am in awe and amazement that he writes about finding the woman of his Dreams. He is so young and has yet to experience loves longing, or loves heartbreak. If I had my way he never would have to go through heartbreak like his old man did (multiple times mind you). If I had my way he would discover the brilliance of his soul mate his first time up to bat. He would find that “fully shining woman” in some serendipitous meeting, some chance encounter and fall totally and permanently in Love. Maybe it’s impossible, I don’t know. Maybe it will happen for Nick. God knows for me it took half my life to get it right. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve loved many women, even married a few, and felt that soul connection often throughout my life. But it wasn’t until I met Meghan that I knew completely and without a doubt I had found the “woman of my dreams”. Let me share a story. Nick figures very prominently in this fairy tale…
About nine years ago I was recovering from yet another round of heartbreak, and consequently raising Nick on my own. His best friend Speed was basically living with us and we were house sitting for some friends and totally living the boys life. I had started dating again and was on the lookout for someone to connect with, be in relationship with, and to help my broken heart mend. I know, bad strategy, but I’m a slow learner. Anyway one night Nick and Speed and I were sitting around the dinner table finishing up when my computer alerted me to an incoming email. I got up and went to my office in the next room and checked it. It was from this woman in NYC I planned to spend a weekend with. We had set it up that I would stay with her at her apartment on the upper East side. Well her email asked where I was going to stay during my visit. I couldn’t believe she was doing that at the last minute after inviting me to stay with her and I returned to the table mumbling about how fickle women can be. Nick (being sensitive to his Dad’s moods) asked what was wrong. I said something like, “I just don’t get women…”. The words that I’m about to write are exactly what came out of his 10 year old mouth.
“Dad it’s like this: you meet these women, and go out for awhile. Then you asked them to marry you. And it’s fine for awhile and then it doesn’t work out and then you get sad. Why not have fun and play around until you meet that fully shining women. Then you will know she is the one”. I was blown away and sat stunned for a minute. I looked over at Speed and his mouth was open too. Nick was just looking at me kinda like Yoda looked at Luke in the swamp. I jumped up from the table knocking over the chair and ran to my computer and wrote down what Nick said.
I didn’t really need to write it down though because I will never forget the seed he planted in my brain that day. And as I sit here writing this I am filled with wonder and awe because I am married to that “fully shining woman” and she is the mother of Bodhi, and a mother to Nick too. Tomorrow I write about meeting that woman when I least expected it. And in retrospect it was as if our lives were on a crash course – destined to come together and live like Love was all that mattered…
May all of you reading this have found, or may find, your true love now.
Peace. J
As You Wish – Part Three
By Jamie Gilroy
- Thursday, May 1st, 2008
Did you get to experience the magic of saying “As you wish” to your beloved? Not to worry, it takes time and a bit of practice. I know you’ll do it and be happier as a result.
I have to apologize to those of you who were waiting with baited breath for the third and final installment yesterday (almost as excruciating as awaiting the final movie of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, but not quite). Life was handing me one of those days where it’s moving so fast and I’m trying to continually keep up – kind of like trying to catch a butterfly with your bare hands. So what’s been going on?
I have received hundreds of perplexed (ok angry) emails asking about my last blog. It seems the proverbial pot got stirred. Here’s a sampling:
What? You must be kidding! Say “as you wish” without question? Isn’t that letting go of our own personal wants and needs?
Doesn’t it mean we’ll be setting ourselves up to be taken advantage of?
What about boundaries? (See Blog: No Pain, No Gain)
What about my boss?
What about my clients?
What about my teenagers?
Are you out of your mind? (Quite possibly)
Wouldn’t my wife/husband ask me to do unreasonable things, or go on endless shopping sprees if I said as you wish?
Ok, first off I recommended trying this with your beloved first before experimenting on anyone else. I am making a HUGE assumption that your beloved will not pretend you’re a contestant on Fear Factor and have you eating handfuls of sea worms. There is a level of respect and trust that is the groundwork for all of this. And it definitely takes faith. Remember this is not about the “me”. It’s about expanding and feeling the magic that can occur between two people when they both open to each other fearlessly. I could respond to each and every email but I won’t.
What I really want to say is that the final leap of faith (As You Wish – Part Three) is about saying that easy little phrase to Life itself. To stand in the face of all the craziness and uncertainty in life that I know we all experience from time to time and say, maybe a bit reluctantly, but say it anyway – AS YOU WISH! Again it’s not about putting yourself in harms way, or being abused, or laying down and giving up. It’s about accepting that Life is happening and you’re a huge part of that. By saying “as you wish” you are letting Life know that you trust Life (just like you trust your beloved). This connection to Life expands as a result, and so do we.
When I look back on all the resistance I felt towards change (Life), I see how much energy I used fighting it. Yet in retrospect I can see how I always was in the perfect place for what I needed to learn in that moment. From where I sit now Life has always brought me exactly what was best for me to keeping growing and changing as a human being. The more I resisted the more I suffered. The more I saw every experience as a link in a chain, or a common thread woven into what is now my beautiful life, the happier I became. Saying “As you wish” to Life is the final leap of faith.
It really is the leap into the unknown. And doesn’t that get your heart racing? I sit here right now at my desk with many things planned for the day. But in reality I have no idea what’s going to happen today no matter how proactive & highly effective I think I am. So what to do?
Just say it. C’mon. Let it slide off your lips. You know. That one simple little phrase.
As you wish!
Have a wonderful day and keep those sea worms where they belong!
J
As You Wish – Part Two
By Jamie Gilroy
- Tuesday, April 29th, 2008
Having given you the evening to digest Part One we’re ready to step out and expand. Now I want to take our new favorite little phrase into a bigger potentially more treacherous arena – relationships. Anyone cringing yet? I can hear all the little voices crying out – “what about me…?” Not to worry. In the end it will all be fine. You’ll be much, much happier. Trust me.
When experiencing the transformation that occurs when we can give the best to ourselves by saying “As you wish” imagine the possibilities when we do that with our beloved. For now I only want to focus on the very close relationships in our lives. (For those of you yearning to be in one of these hang in there – this applies to you as well).
In reviewing my intimate relationships in the past I can see how I always tripped over one very big obstacle. ME. That obstacle was my idea of how things “should be”. I was always so invested in my vision of right or wrong, or the division of labor, or who was in charge, or how the load was distributed, or who was in the lead, or who initiated this or that, or who took out the trash….
Ok you must get the idea. To me being in relationship was way more about keeping Jamie intact, then really opening to the wonder of possibility. Hence my multiple chances at practice. For a thick skulled Aries type practice becomes how we live. Practicing our way through life until by some freakish chance (opportunity/Divine Intervention) we get to stop practicing and get in the game. Let me explain. There is a point coming.
So when I met Meghan things changed immediately. Alright, not first met, but when we “got together” (wink, wink) for the first time I knew right away it was not going be the same old story, it was definitely show time. No more rehearsals and playing with keeping my idea of how things should be intact. I tried something else for a change. And god knows how I came to this, maybe I had recently just watched the Princess Bride with Nick, or maybe I was trying to be clever in the throes of a new relationship. You know all that Aries charm in full swing. But a really odd thing happened. When Meg would ask me if I could do something I began to reply “As you wish”. The first time definitely felt a little bit scary. Yet it was also funny to see what happened. Meg went on her way (I’m guessing she was thinking she hit the lottery with this lug) smiling and happy. And I stood there thinking that wasn’t so bad. I’m still here. The world hadn’t ended. I did hear a tiny voice going “help, what about me…” but I said pipe down and ignored it. Actually I felt quite exhilarated. I was hooked. No matter what Meg asked I said “As you wish” just like Westley said to Buttercup. The more I did it the better I felt, and the best part was I could see the favorable reaction in Meg. The little fissures that show up in relationships from bickering and negotiating never evolved into the San Andreas Fault like they often do. The atmosphere in our relationship was peaceful and harmonious and so much of that had to do with me letting go of my point of view, my hardened sense of identity, and surrendering to that beautiful little phrase. The best part is I still am saying it after all these years and we’re still happy in Love.
As you wish.
Tomorrow Part Three – The Final Leap of Faith.
Until then enjoy the Fire Swamp, and watch out for the R.O.U.S.!
J
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