Archive for May, 2009
Spiritual Transformation Class based on The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz in CT
By Gayle Franceschetti
- Friday, May 15th, 2009
The Heart-Mind Wisdom Group Weekend Workshops
with Gayle Franceschetti & Julio Ortiz
Dec 4th & 5th, Feb 5th & 6th, Apr 9th & 10th, Jun 4th & 5th
Fridays 6:30 PM-9:00 PM, Saturdays 9:00 AM-3:00PM
Cost: $175.00 per weekend
36 Cheshire Road Wallingford, CT 06492
The Heart Mind Wisdom Group, will be using the underlying wisdom of the Four Agreements as well as the ancient traditions of other modalities to clear a path to learn, use, and live from their “heart mind” in everyday life. Discussion and experiential activities will lead to a deeper understanding of the belief that by living life with awareness, we are creating the world in which we live. The objective of this gathering is to assist students in rediscovering their Divine authentic self – to reconnect with their core essence – that of unconditional love – where the heart is in direct communication with the soul.
Please RSVP to: Gayle at gayle@lifemasteryprograms.com or call 203-265-2927 . For more information, please visit www.return2love.net
Holistic Self-Care Class in Boston Area: Earthly Delights
By Grace Sardonicus
- Friday, May 15th, 2009
Life Mastery Programs is pleased to announce a Holistic Self-Care Class in the Boston Area.
Earthly Delights: Give the gift of health this Summer … to YOURSELF!!
With Grace Ventura Sardonicus
Born from Grace’s passion to share tools that dramatically improve wellness, this workshop offers you cutting-edge nutritional tools, imaging exercises, yummy healthy food & juicing recipes.
Class 1: What is an EmBodyDream?
Wake up to the distortions in your mind about your body. Why do we fall into ruts of ill health? Learn how to support great health by learning to ‘witness’ your mind. Take home tools & homework to support your journey.
Class 2: How do You Treat your Temple? Identify personal & family legacy. Let’s be the change that we want to see in our children &the world!
Workshop A: Cooking Yummy Healthy Meals. Taste & take home great recipes.
Class 3: Transform Attitudes & Cehaviors. Changing our planet begins with changing our the temple!
Workshop B: Creative Juicing. Learn how to juice & function in your daily life while safely cleansing toxins & rejuvenating.
Class 4: Rebalancing as a Permanent Way of Inhabiting the Body. Integrating & creating an ongoing support system.
Workshop Dates: Friday, August 21, 7-9PM, Saturday, August 22, 9AM- 4PM, (includes lunch) & Sunday, August 23, 9AM-Noon
Cost: $225. plus $20. materials fee
Location: Yoga Passion, 32 West St. Beverly Farms,Ma (Northshore of Boston)
RSVP please contact: Grace at 603-651-9642 or grace@lifemasteryprograms.com
Toltec Wisdom: Mastering Authenticity
By Rita Rivera Fox
- Thursday, May 14th, 2009
We are masters because we have the power to create. We are creating in every moment, and the magic tool we use for creation is the word, the words that we use with ourselves and with other people; the words that we use to describe ourselves and the world around us. Our power to create is so strong that whatever we believe comes true. But what is it that we have created? What is it that we have mastered? This question is easy to answer by simply looking at our lives. What is present in your life right now is the result of what you have mastered. Is your life filled with happiness, friendship, and abundance or have you limited your creation with beliefs and concepts that limit the flow of these things?
When we awaken and have the courage to see our lives and everything that we have created, we can reclaim our power as the creator. As self-realized creators we can take responsibility for our creation, the same way that an artist can create a new work of art. This new creation begins with honesty and by looking closely at the beliefs we have about ourselves. Once we do this, we begin to notice that the words we use silently within our own mind are the most powerful words of all, for it is with these words that we manifest everything.
Recovering the authentic self is a process of unlearning the beliefs and habits that define who we think we are in order to become who we truly are. The authentic self creates from our true feelings, and our feelings are the basis of our integrity. To live from our integrity is to know that we are choosing the beliefs we will create from, and we use the emotions as the barometer for this choice. Our emotions are the messages from the authentic self. They are ever present and always speaking to us, but we interpret our emotions through our beliefs and often judge and reject them.
When we become aware, we can see that every thought and belief has an emotional response. If we find our emotions to be uncomfortable or out of balance, we simply need to look at what we believe about ourselves in order to bring our emotions into a new light. There is no such thing as a negative emotion; it is only our judgments about the emotion that causes a negative reaction. We can learn to master our emotions by mastering our thoughts and words so that we can arrive at a newfound respect for the emotional body. Mastering new words of self-love will allow the emotional body to feel wonderful!
It is your true nature to express from love because you are Love. When you learn how to do this, you become the creator of a masterpiece; you become a master of choice. When you live this truth, every action will only produce happiness, abundance and the absolute fulfillment of who you are.
A synthesis of ancient shamanic healing and modern technique based in Toltec Wisdom, form the heart of the teachings of Rita Rivera. Through powerful energetic healing principles she creates the environment for personal transformation and continually empowers and uplifts the spirit to facilitate the expression of the authentic self. As one of don Miguel Ruiz’s (author o The Four Agreements) original apprentices she has worked closely with him for over 10 years co-facilitating workshops and Power Journeys throughout the world, in service to actualizing the love that is our human essence.
What is Mindful Parenting? (Part 1) Tapping into Your Heart’s Desire
By Meghan McChesney Gilroy
- Thursday, May 14th, 2009
Like so many of us, I want to be the best parent I can be. One of the ways I do so is through being mindful of how I am parenting my son Bodhi. When I am aware of what I am thinking and feeling within myself, as well as what I am saying and doing while interacting with him, then I have the choice to create loving interactions. Being conscious also gives me the power to modify when I fall short of my intent. And like all parents, there are certainly days when I do!
Ironically, I begin being mindful by setting aside my mind and tapping into my heart. Through my spiritual practice, I have connected to what my heart desires. Our hearts don’t speak the language of words (that’s the mind’s job); they speak the language of emotion. So our heart’s desire is the prevalent emotional quality that we want present in our lives. For me, the feeling I enjoy most is a sensation of peaceful centeredness. A sense of balance and connectedness. Playfulness and contented joy.
I know from experience that I can only share this emotional energy with my world when I am able to create this feeling for myself. I can’t give what I don’t have. Of course I don’t live in this state all the time. I can be challenged by what my mind believes instead of what my heart feels. I have a long to do list that pulls my time and attention in multiple directions. And I have an active toddler who loves to stick his foot in our dog’s water dish as we are walking out the door.
Yet when I remember to make time to take care of myself so I feel balanced, then I can more fluidly create that balance around me. When I remember that my heart desires peace during a busy day, I can sink back into the moment. When I recall that I want to share my love of feeling connected with Bodhi even when he is throwing a tantrum, then I can draw on my creativity to find a solution that brings us both back into alignment with the feeling state I value.
So what emotional quality does your heart most desire for yourself? For your family? Every heart has its own song. Perhaps you already know what feeling is your top priority. If not, I suggest finding a few moments (and I know that can be a challenge!) and sit quietly. Take several deep breaths into your heart. Ask yourself, “What feeling or quality do I most yearn for in my life?”
Then listen. The answer may come as a sensation or image. Or you might hear a word bubble up into your consciousness from a voice from deep inside. Initially you may also hear what you don’t want. Do you best to be open to your heart’s response. Often our minds will immediately kick in with its list of reasons why your heart’s desire simply isn’t possible. Thank your mind and breathe back into your heart. Listen some more. Repeat as necessary.
Since I discovered my heart’s desire, I have an internal guidance system that allows me to cut through chaos and confusion – whether it’s coming at me externally from a wound-up 2-year old or from within myself in the form of not knowing “How do I deal with that?” When I ask my heart, “What would peace do?” I unearth all sorts of solutions from a space within that feels larger than myself. In this space, I am connected to my own intuition and wisdom, I am in the moment, and I am not relying solely on my mind’s preconceived ways of navigating this world. Whether I come up with an answer that solves the challenge or not, I have at least connected back to my center. And isn’t that what my heart desired in the first place?
As I mindfully parent Bodhi using both my head and my heart, I know I am modeling balance and emotional awareness. I am connecting to myself in delightful new ways and I am delighting in connecting to him anew. And I am bathing him in the emotional energy of love in action, no matter what appears in each moment.
The Four Agreements in the Workplace – Class 2½ – Business Systems – inspired by the wisdom of don Miguel Ruiz
By Kevin Murray
- Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
In Class 2, I mentioned Business Systems and I’d like to expand on that – (expansion recommendation by Meghan McChesney Gilroy-the wise.)
What are business systems? And where are they in your business? They are in everything, behind everything and everywhere all the time. Really.
Why are Business Systems important? Because all the results that you and your business create will flow from the systems you have. And results are Profitability, Employee retention, Client satisfaction etc. i.e. Big Important Results. I’d say that primary divisions of systems in any enterprise are systems that: 1) Generate Leads 2) Convert Leads to Clients and 3) Fulfill on whatever it is that your clients want you to do.
Sometimes it is hard to see the systems operating in your own business. As Mr. Deming said “A system can not understand itself. The transformation requires a view from outside.” A fairly Toltec point of view, don’t you think? If you’d like to borrow an external point-of-view to look at your business, call me or email me, this is part of my Coaching practice.
One big distinction that helps is that these systems exist on a continuum from very informal to very formal. The way the phone is answered is a business system. If it is scripted and the same all the time no matter who answers, then it is likely a formal system. If the way the phone is answered changes depending on who answers or how they are feeling, it is a rather informal system, yet it is a system none the less.
If you chunk your business processes down to the things that happen between the time a prospective client first learns about you to the time you have a satisfied new client (providing referrals) then all of these little pieces are parts of the Overall system and can be systems in and of themselves. It may seem silly or busy work to try and define systems for minutiae like opening mail, checking phone messages etc, but much organizational energy is wasted by having the same things done different ways at different times by different people. And you aren’t going to maximize the results you want if your systems are informal and/or not adhered to. Let’s say that you do a mailer to 300 people once a month. A good system might include a checklist with how you print, copy, fold, where the forms are on the computer, database maintenance instructions etc. Another system might be to approach it like it’s a new task every time. Can you see that there might be, if not a “best” way, at least a “better” way to do this task that would benefit from systemization?
Another system example that is very big in my business is the Proposal System. If I didn’t have a solid system and process for reviewing project needs and itemizing costs, labor and material inputs, I wouldn’t have much control over project profitability. I don’t do this different ways. I have what is currently “the best” way to do it. I say “currently” because my systems are dynamic and changing and always being improved!!! [ wow 3 exclamation points-that must be really important]
I would not counsel you to break everything down this way, and it is usually best to let the people working “in” the system to work “on” the system – they’ll feel more ownership and system shifts will more likely stick. [for extra credit- say "Sticky System Shifts " 3 times out loud real fast - and send me a comment- you'll earn 10 Toltec points]
*Big System-Shifting Recommendation* – work on the systems that will yield big results quickly and that will reduce areas of upset. If we borrow the idea from Class 2 that says that personal upsets point to systems issues, follow this through to find where are the most upsets in the business. Is Shipping not shipping well and creating big headaches? Are there quality issues requiring costly rework? Are computer issues slowing down everyone’s productivity? Wherever there are big upsets, there’s a strong clue that a systems shift could be warranted.
Some shifts are very easy and quick and can implemented without any costs. A great example is a retail store with their informal greeting system. How many times have Sales Associates come up to you and said “Can I help you with anything?” Usually we say no, maybe yes, but this is a closed-end, yes or no question with a strong chance of ending the conversation. In a new more formal system, the Sales Associate might ask ” What brings you in to our store today?” This might begin a conversation to help this customer buy something they wanted. It’s a small system shift, but it could create a great difference over a volume of visitors.
Where do you see systems in your business that are causing you, your employees and clients distress? A great piece of homework [thanks to Joanne Dunleavy] is to look for and write down all the systems you see next time you go out for a meal. It’s quite eye opening. With just a small shift in your own attention, you can become a great Systems Thinker.
For Class 1 of this series- click here
For Class 2 of this series- click here – for “Don’t Take Anything Personally”
For Class 3 of this series- click here – for “Dont Make Assumptions”
The Four Agreements in the Workplace – Class 3 – more wisdom from don Miguel Ruiz
By Kevin Murray
- Monday, May 11th, 2009
It’s about Effective Communication!
The third of the Four Agreements is “Don’t Make Assumptions.” In the book by don Miguel Ruiz, the author tells us “The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth.” It is also a big, error-prone shortcut to communication. And here is where this agreements meets the workplace. If our habit of making assumptions is getting in the way of effective two-way communication, we are wasting a lot of energy in our places of work. Later in this page, I’ll share with you the “CURE*” to no longer making assumptions. Using this cure will make your time and energy much more effective in all areas of your business.
In our business day, when we speak, we assume that the other people know what we are talking about. We assume that they have the same background and knowledge that we do. The reality is that we are coming from two different worlds (if there are only two in this conversation) – the more people- the more worlds are coming together. What do I mean by “worlds?” We each create our own versions of life and reality. Based on all of our knowledge, and based on what has been recently happening in our lives. It’s as if we have been traveling to some strange and exotic locale on our own, and then we return to interact with others who have been off on their own journeys. We assume that people are on the same page with us, but that is rarely the case.
As we begin a new conversation, whether it’s a sales call, or a vendor communication or a meeting, we’ve been thinking about this and preparing for it – and they have not. The other has been involved with many other things, none of them having to do with us. There is a little bit of “taking things personally” here.
We launch in to whatever is on our agenda and it might take quite a few minutes, if ever, for the other person to be on the same track as us. The result is that we spend a lot of energy sending out communication that is not being received. Then we might either: have to repeat ourselves, wonder why we’re not getting our message across, or get upset that the other person is not paying attention. In all three cases, we were assuming that the other was open, willing and ready to be attentive simply because we were!
A more energy efficient approach is to check in, *ask questions, see how the other person is and see where they are at in this moment. This might take a little more time, and we may feel that is a little off-task. But if we can tee up a conversation or meeting this way, we spend more time on-purpose, there is more real relating going on, and our communications are much more effective.
*The cure to making assumptions is to ask questions. Be curious! The time will come in any conversation to address your agenda items. But if you adopt a stance of curiosity, and really demonstrate that through questions and listening, you’ll be amazed at what might happen. You’ll get your business done, but you’ll also get to know another human being a little better.
Try adopting Curiosity for your next call or meeting and let me know what shifts for you. Please use the comments to share this with other readers.
For Class 1 of this series- click here
For Class 2 of this series- click here – for “Don’t Take Anything Personally”
Thanks, Kevin
The Four Agreements in the Workplace – Class 2 of don Miguel Ruiz’ Wisdom
By Kevin Murray
- Thursday, May 7th, 2009
Don’t Take Anything Personally – the 2nd Agreement from don Miguel Ruiz and The Four Agreements
[to review The Four Agreements in the Workplace - Class 1 - click here]
We’re working with The Four Agreements to see how we use and lose energy in ourselves and our organizations. In this section, you’ll see where much of your energy goes and how to recapture it to deploy for better results in your life and work.
[**BIG VALUABLE CONCEPT DOWN BELOW!!]
In our individual lives we use a lot of energy in a day to support the stories and ideas of who we think we are. We defend. We may argue. We may criticize and gossip about others who don’t agree with our points of view. For most of us, before we begin a path of Awareness, we aren’t really very conscious about the beliefs and opinions that we are upholding. We simply believe them as if they are true. We have faith in them without question. And many of these ideas and concepts are merely points-of-view; they are not necessarily true.
However, there is a big connection between these beliefs, how we hold them, and the emotional and energetic response they create in our own lives. Many times someone will say something in an off-hand way, and we may have an emotional response. Someone may say something about all the rain we’re having. We might have a reaction like “they are so negative, I don’t like negativity like this around me. I’m not like that person.” We may not say anything, but the mind goes automatically into a reaction. The reaction causes physical responses in our body, like tightness, heat and tension. And then our mind interprets the physical response as an emotion, like anger or fear. This begins a feedback loop between the mind and body, and can use up a lot of energy – just because someone noticed that it’s raining!
This is called “Taking it Personally.” Even if what the person is saying really has nothing to do with us, we take it personally. We all do this a lot. The good news is that once we begin to develop awareness of the comings and goings of this responsive mechanism, we can begin to make different thoughtful choices instead of having automatic reactions.
In the workplace, there is an organizational “mind” made up of all the culture, history, beliefs and “how-we-do-things-around-here” just like in our individual mind. We can use our emotional reactions in the workplace to bring more light to the pieces of the Systems mind that could use a little transformation.
I remember a time when I was not happy with an Office Manager in my company. I felt that she was always complaining and telling others about how she was a victim in many parts of her life. She was always complaining. And I started to be “always complaining” about her to anyone that would listen. [Do you already see where this is going?]
After a few months of this, I saw in one sparkling, clear moment, that there was no difference between her complaining and mine. I was taking her complaints personally, even though they (mostly) had nothing to do with me! Once I saw this and got a big laugh at myself, I began to see that I could have a choice when my complaints would rise up. I could say “oh, that’s just old automatic stuff, let me really listen and see what is here and if there is anything for me to do about it.”
I noticed that some of what she was saying, and where she was taking things personally came from holes, gaps or lack of clarity in our business systems. This is the magical insight in this section. If you notice yourself or someone else really taking things personally at work, chances are there is a System issue behind it.
[**This is the Big Idea]
Imagine shifting your own reactions when you see that someone or something isn’t working as you wish in your business. Instead of the automatic reaction of ” this shouldn’t be happening” or “why me?” or “this customer is a jerk” imagine saying “what is the system issue or need behind this?”
Suspending the automatic “taking it personally” in this way allows to you reclaim 50% or more of your wasted energy in a day. (that is a fact I made up.)
But try this and let me know what you find. Please use the comments feature of this blog and let’s create some dialog here with real-life examples. Or email to me at Kevin@earthandlight.com.
We’ll continue this idea and we still have 3 other agreements to tackle. Thank you for being part of this conversation!
Kevin
Click here to go to Class 3 – Don’t Make Assumptions
The Four Agreements in the Workplace – Class 1-inspired by the wisdom of don Miguel Ruiz
By Kevin Murray
- Wednesday, May 6th, 2009
The Four Agreements are powerful tools to unleash one of the greatest assets in any organization: Your Energy! And by extension, the energy of all the others in the enterprise can also be sent soaring. What is possible is not simply an increase in performance (although you will certainly enjoy those) but rather an entire new point-of-view that connects the creative potential of the individual to the mission and goals of the business. And the creative potential I’m pointing to is the profound flowering of an individual that comes from a process of increasing mindfulness and self-understanding in relation to others. Multiply this individual transformation across many people in an organization, and you have a world-class organization.
Whether you are a systems-oriented thinker along the lines of W. Edwards Deming or a fan of The Four Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferriss, The Four Agreements, by don Miguel Ruiz provides a simple-to-learn, lifetime-to-master set of principles that can create amazing leverage for today’s small business owners, entrepreneurs and professional managers.
When I say “leverage,” I mean greater results with relatively less effort. Another way of saying this is “working smarter not harder.” These days with increasing global competition in all markets, we all need to enjoy greater leverage. Also for individuals, leverage is the way to come back to work-life balance. As we create more results in our work lives more efficiently, we have more time and energy for our non-work pursuits.
The Four Agreements are:
- Be Impeccable with Your Word
- Don’t Take Anything Personally
- Don’t Make Assumptions
- Always Do Your Best
So where to begin? How about almost at the beginning with #2?
The next installment will be about:
Don’t Take Anything Personally
When we first engage The Four Agreements to shift our energy in our workplaces, the first place to look is: where are we using our energy now? One of the places we invest so much energy is in: Taking Things Personally…. To be continued….
Click here to go to Class 2 – Don’t Take Anything Personally
Click here to go to Class 3 – Don’t Make Assumptions
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